Updated: Oct 3, 2018
I believe that the Lord will sell the house! What more do I need to do to make it sell?
I believe the Lord will provide! Should I get a job to help pay the bills ?
I believe that the Lord will raise the funds! What can I do to make people want to give?
I believe we are moving to Guatemala! Why aren't we there yet?
I am a bundle of contradictions. Believing one minute and doubting the next. Confident then cowardly. At peace but filled with anxiety. Patiently drowning in urgency. I believe, Lord. Help my unbelief!
There's the old saying, "God helps those who help themselves." But I think that saying totally misses the point. I'm pretty sure it should say, "God helps us because we cannot help ourselves." How do we come to fully rely on him when we are too busy trusting in our own abilities?
And yet... there's that story about the guy in the flood who keeps refusing help because he is sure that God will save him by a divine miracle. When he drowns and goes to heaven he is confused. He asks God why he wasn't saved when he believed with his whole heart that he would be. God replies, " I sent you a warning, a car, a canoe, and a helicopter. What more were you looking for?"
Trust AND obey. We have to trust that he will save us AND keep our eyes open for the ways he is working to bring that about. I used to worry that I would be like the guy on the roof. I believed that I believed in God's goodness but doubted my own ability to recognize his provision. Then I realized that doubting MY ABILITY to understand his will was really doubting HIS ABILITY to make his will known. Do I really think that the creator of the universe, the one who knit me together in my mother's womb, the author and perfecter of my faith is not able to make his will known to me? In the big picture I believe. But in the little everyday details and decisions I still need help overcoming my disbelief.